I hope you hear my screams every time my mouth shuts,
I hope you stop my tears before it comes out,
I hope you give me warmth before my mind numbs,
I hope you color out my canvas that is black and white.
I hope you can cut down my pain in the time of vain,
I hope you pick me up and say it “You’re the best!”
I hope you kiss me and suck out my all pain,
I hope you find my weirdness unique.
I hope you had a good day every day,
I hope you feel my legs shaking and hug me like nothing happened,
I hope you to be with me when I’m lost,
I hope you exist. I hope!
Thanks for reading.
Being in love doesn’t mean to date that over popular chick of the town neither it does mean dating that fitness freak stud of the city that freak out the girls of the society.
Although I don’t know much about love and relationship stuff I feel it is something which soothes your ears when you hear your lover’s voice, I also do feel it is something you wanna see first when you wake up (except parents, they are essentials). I feel it is something you seek to talk about whenever you feel down.
I do feel it is like solid in your hearts that melts through eyes and when you talk it out it the vapors of cuddles gets you high, so high that you and your lover get transferred to another world, which is far sorted than this one.
It is feeling that you can’t steal from somebody. It’s not about finding the perfect person, it is about finding the right person.
For me, love is an imaginary emotion that makes one feel alive when their hopes of living are dying. It is that touch that rejuvenates the aching soul. Body love is just a Lust!
Never experienced what it likes to be in love. not that I don’t want to, but I feel you can’t fake love.
I feel it is something which is true and happens only a few times during one’s life, you can’t force someone to be with you.
Hoping that you end up with your love once you found them. xo 🙂
Thanks for Reading.
No record of how many times my emotions got harassed,
Mind stressed, body pressed and I feel depressed.
Standing with a beating heart that forgot to beat normal,
Informal encounters with closed one seems like formal.
My mother told me at an early age,
People will come and go and memory will fade.
The world will show you it’s true colors when your eyes was hurt,
So stand out and be the best, put on your favorite shirt.
Carrying a corpse for self because ain’t no one got your back,
The ones you used to roam with are now ready to cut your neck.
Moving with dead men inside that was once alive,
The boy learned things at his early age, he learned how to survive.
Thanks for Reading.
Scars are broken stars that had a tragic start,
Falling indefinitely, tearing apart and apart.
Turning into pieces by tearing down peace,
High pressure on the head, thoughts gonna cease.
Wounded scars seeks healing touch,
Come and give it your curing first aid.
Just some care and affection, not lousy attraction,
Cut down by mean words, fake compliments feels like detraction.
You can heal or you can hurt,
These scars no more get hid in my ripped shirt.
No more blood is left to bleed, got barely pulses to survive,
Just need an ocean of love to dive in order to sort up my life.
Thanks for Reading.
It’s been a long time that I have written a blog! My recent posts were mostly Poetry.
So here it goes:
Lately, I used to feel about the thoughts like “how lonely I am?” , “Is I am really weird?”.
I hardly share my feelings with people because I do not develop trust easily
on people because “Man, people are complicated!”. They are like that first the come close to you and force you to tell your things to them and the other moment they left you like they were never there in your life.
It feels good when someone shows interests in your life, it feels like they really care about you.
Trust me, it feels so good. It really does.
It’s quite easy to develop feelings for people over time but what hurts the most is seeing those people getting attached to someone else other than you, when you placed them at your topmost priority.
It feels like you are being left behind and you don’t belong anywhere in their lives.
Anxiety is not imaginary. Neither depression is. I am not depressed but I get anxious at times.
Some people whom you wanna get closed to and you are determined to live your life with are precious when they treat you like strangers it didn’t feel strange. It feels like a betrayal.
Just feelings that were finding their ways to come out. love y’all. xo
Thanks For Reading.
Like the sweet to diabetic,
The lust of ground to sky
The reward to the beggar and the water to thirst
You could be the one to me. but you were so you.
Like the soul of the body,
Strings of the guitar, notes of a keyboard
Melody to song and rhythm to melody
You could be my valentine, but you were so you.
Like the battery to a phone,
The processor for a machine and the fuel for a car
The roads for transport and the sky to fly
You could be my path to life, but you were so you.
Like the Antarctica for a penguin,
Ocean for fish, space for the moon
You was winter, I was summer
I could’ve been the winter for you, but you didn’t listen because you were so you…
Broke inside, watching the people
Wanting to cure them but I ain’t-a healer!
They are sad their eyes are wet-
Can we talk instead of fact that we never met?
Wounded heart beating in grieve
Worrying about things it couldn’t achieve
Rhymes are easier when the mind can relate
I still couldn’t write love tales because I ain’t got my first date.
Polite and honest thoughts offend people, don’t know why
They think I’m toxicated, even though I ain’t even high.
Sadness is not bad always and it’s not a crime to cry,
The mind is complex but the heart is sober and it doesn’t lie.
Thanks for Reading!
At the dark night, moonlight and I had a conversation,
she asked me “hey boy, what you been up to?”
“kinda messed up” I replied.
“Why you’re wasting time on a boy like me?” with curiosity I asked.
Moonlight replied “because all of the smarties out there are too egoistic to talk”
We had a conversation all night,
Also I discussed the battles in my mind and told how I avoid internal fights.
Moonlight was too deep to dive into, but deep down there I found momentary peace,
It felt my mind is lightened and my soul is rejuvenated.
It’s not wrong to say I was having a good time with the moonlight,
Darkness accompanied me, it felt safer than ever!
All the answers to my question appeared as the stars in the sky,
It was a pleasure, it was the moment I’ve been lusting for so long.
I passed into sleep, dreams were my guide at the time,
Anxiety and sorrow nowhere, how have the things appeared so fine?
This pleasure was so good until the vision started to be faded,
I was reluctant to open the eyes because I knew it’s over because the sun came out!
Where will you go,
When everyone looks at you like you’re criminal and you’re the victim?
Whom gonna listen to you when you don’t have any friends?
Is happiness that hard to achieve?
Poison, poison is my teenage
It consists of bad feelings, don’t interrupt.
The mind is abrupt and body is corrupt.
Friends are fake, no one to trust!
Society suffocates like they are pressing throat,
Breathing is hard in this poisonous teenage.
No room for sobriety, everyone here is superior
no poison is good, at least it can kill you at once, not every day!
Man. I used to happy and jolly kid. I was happy in my world which was not perfect but at least sorted.
Things elevated, I was doing good in life but do you know what happened then?
I fell in a well that was incorporated by anxiety, depression and overthinking.
They were so addictive and got me like they were my old lost friend. they stuck with me like they really cared for me and they kept on pulling me backward toward them, pulling me apart from the tantrums of the fake hollow world. they dragged me down to that depth from where things were jet black and vision was definitely not there, when I thought I could escape the well. Then I realized now it was too late to even think of escape.
No way of coming out of this depth less well came to my senses. I was so numb at that time but now I knew that these things (anxiety, depression and overthinking) took me so the depth of myself that I lost in myself.
Hope for coming out of this well died with the death of the same old person I used to be. Now I am a sad and suicidal human body
with no feelings, some called me robot some calls me mean (they even don’t know how a robot can be mean).
I never share my feelings with anyone because I don’t have any. They always thought I’ve been holding on too many things.
I don’t know what to tell them, I just give them a fake cute smile and leave them because they are happy people and don’t deserve to get their life darkened by a dark boy like me.
Now, I just move and lay, listen but don’t say. People sometimes call me fake, I got really confused what and whom they are referring to?
does my existence make any sense? does my non-existence will make any difference?
Sadness is not fake neither suicides are planned.
Note: All the guys out there with the sad and suicidal mindset just remember you are not weak neither you are any less, you will bloom and be happy and remember its all inside us. Just don’t give a damn about what people have to say.